Weekly Archives This week 1 week ago

Back to blogs homepage

my little white wedding diary...with sugar on

Monday Feb 08 2010 14:01:17

By Mrs G to be 9 days and counting..

And so....I am up to date!

Our wedding is in 9 days time...I've still not done everything for it.....Im stressing but trying not to. Im already at ends with this eye infection which is plaguing my life....but there's not much I can do about it. My doctor just looked at me and said thank god for photoshop...but its not really funny. I've spent four months planning this wedding and I dont want to look like a clown on the day whether or not the photographer can work miracles!!

The boy had his stag night a week ago...which resulted in him knocking himself out in the back garden in the snow and lying unconsciense for about two hours until I found him and got him treated for hyperthermia and head wound..... He went out at 4 and couldn't remember anything past 8pm and Madame Whiplash ...including the other four bars they all went too..and the after party that raged for three hours at his mates house. The photo's are comical.

My hen night was traditional with the...'find a condom...steal s guys boxers and a jumping willy' as well as lots of shots and a gigantic cocktail courtesy of my lovely friends.

Now we have recovered...apart from the boys graze above his eye still....but we still look like we have been cage fighting....

Our colours for our wedding are blue...the Scottish national colour.....cadbury purple...the boy's fav colour and ivory..to break it all up a bit.
Tradition knows it that the Groom cannot see the bridal gown before the day...likewise for us I also cannot see the Boys attire...all I know is he is wearing a kilt. Despite his scottish heritage Ive never seen him in a kilt...the anticipation is immense!

My gown is nothing he could be expecting.......and Im very much inlove with it. If the weddings not just about the person you are marrying...it most definately is ..THE DRESS...

I have completely personalised our wedding....I have made individual gift bags for all our guests including the little ones...I have ipod songs during the dinner for everyone's tastes.....and the Boy and I have also decided for fun that all our guests should do a little speech as well as us. Its such an informal affair that the unconventional goes... :-)

As for the planning...am still unsure whether to have the hairdresser or not as I love the way I style my own hair.....but at the same time everyone has bad hair days which would not be good on that particular day.........I still need a cupcake stand.............we still have not picked up best mans gift form the shop.........and I still have not sorted ipod........

because of infection I cant do much as I dont dare go out!!

Alas enough sitting on here when bathroom needs cleaning and cd's need to be uploaded.....

my little white wedding diary...with sugar on

Monday Feb 08 2010 10:11:33

By Mrs G to be 9 days and counting..

..................but just before I left he woke. I was just sitting watching him asleep feeling sad that it would never work when he opened his eyes and looked at me. He was upset that I was just going to go and not say anything...then he announced he was coming with me...that he'd take some time off work too....

I was a bit unsure...but we did just that...and we drove down to my house in the south.
The drive was fun...we felt like thelma and louise ha ha....but when we got to my house it all felt different :-( There I was real life...tidying up my mess and doing the shopping....
The boy felt out of place and I knew it. I did too. for the first time in a week I didn't feel it was right....the next day he went back home :-( I was upset but it seamed to be the right thing to do for both of us.

It was like a fantasy had become a reality for a little while. I still believed I still loved him...but because of my sweetheart feelings over him and the way real life surely is...it was like a fairytale in the noughties....and that just doesnt happen.

For the next few days I was depressed...went to work...went out with my friends...tried to just take what ever happened, for what it was...like a flash in the pan... but he kept contact. And only a few days after he went home, he asked if he could come back down..to see me and talk about things. And to be honest I reluctantly agreed.

When I saw him again my spirits lifted and I felt soo happy. He stayed for a few days and we went out, stayed in and were just ourselves. It felt different this time, and we both agreed we just had a shock with things happening so quickly...that it was kind of cold feet if you like.seeing him again brought all my feelings back and I just didn't want to let him go.
We decided we wanted to to try and see how things went...despite the distance. So thats what we did. But we fell harder and soon it became the distance was too great........

I truely had never felt this way about anyone before...despite him being so far away..everyday I felt so happy just knowing he was mine...to get a text and a phone call. We talk for hours everyday...and we talked about everything...it just felt so right. He even asked me to marry him on a tropical beach one day...this was only weeks after we had met...

Earlier in the year I had a radical life stopping moment and reality shock that made me think hard about things....I dont really want to talk about what happened, but it made me see that life is too short for regrets and not to live it how you're instincts tell you...
So I decided to leave everything I had, to be with him.

And I did just that.

He first offered to come down to me...but it made sense for me to move more...
So two months after we had first met at Mc'Donalds...I left my job, packed my things, sold my house and left to be with him. We moved into a gorgeous home only two miles away from our McDonalds!!
Living with him was just easy from the start...it just worked....even though we had our stressful times..job hunting and adjusting...it was like it was meant to be. I had to pinch myself to believe that I was actually here...living with the boy I wanted so badly all those years ago. It was like a dream...and I didn't want it to end....

People thought we were crazy..our family and our friends thought it wouldn't work and we had done things too soon. It was difficult to hear the negetivity...but it bounced right off us and no one could have imagined how we were feeling.

As it was it just got better..........when after 17 months we decided it felt right to spend the rest of our lives together...so on the secret we booked our wedding.

Our date is the 17th February 2010 in Scotland...I dunno why we chose Scotland..we just did.
We have so many family and friends...but we didn't want our wedding to be all show and not have time together...so we made it intimate and personal...with no more than 25 specially chosen guests.

We gave our invitations out at christmas time...everyone was supprised but happy. It started to feel very real at this point.

On my wedding day to the boy I want to really feel the bond and commitment we are making and share the day together...not be too busy with photo's and guests and no time for each other.
I want to remember every second of it as I know from others, that the day flies over.

We have been through so much in such a short space of time...that its only been 20 months since we got together...but feels like its always been this way. I guess thats why I felt the way I did all those years ago....I mean, is there such thing as fate? and could I already feel it happening at only 14?

Whatever it was it lead me to this point......yes, a fairytale of the noughties...
That when I look at him I still do somersaults inside...that I cant wiat to see him at the end of everyday...and lying next to him at night is the best sleep Ive ever had!
And he tells me the same. The things he tells me and text me through the day..that he feels the way I do....

In 9 days I will marry him. The love of my life.

my little white wedding diary...with sugar on

Sunday Feb 07 2010 20:44:32

By Mrs G to be 9 days and counting..

I was shell shocked to hear from him!.......ever hear from him!
I always hated the notion of facebook until my friend convinced me to set up a profile. Full of old school mates and friends lost throughout the years as well as new ones. And he had found me this way!

I had just got home from work and a nice long run and was running a bath. I checked my emails and there it was…a message from the illusive boy! How? I thought he never even knew I was alive….but then that’s all facebook was..adding people who you knew of and even friends of them…I was just another person? Or maybe not…..we exchanged numbers almost immediately…half an hour later we were textin…we text all night…until about 2am.

He told me all about himself, about school days, the army, what he was doing now…he sent me pics..I told him all about me and what I was doing. I found it hard to believe it was actually him I was talking too! It was like a dream!...

But the next morning….I got another text…and all that day…and the next…..it was like it wasn’t real…..I expected it to dye out….

He then asked to talk to me.

The first time I heard his voice was nothing I expected! He was just so northern! Where as my accent had softened lots over the years. He said I sounded posh…I said he sounded common!

The second time we spoke was the magical moment. I heard him burst out laughing for the first time….at someone he was with in his street. And that was it. I fell inlove. If I hadn’t been inlove with him at school, I certainly was now.

I was so wrapped up in it all I ignored the practicalities of this. The boy lived 300 miles away. He has his own life and I had mine. This was all just a tangle in our grown up lives..

For weeks we chatted and text….we talked about meeting…..

One day while I was at work he sent me a text…asking me if I thought it was possible to fall inlove with someone you’ve never met…. I said yes…and we decided to meet.

Our first meeting was June 1st….on a wet windy day. We met at the romantic Mc’Donalds.
I spent four hours on the road to meet him. I was nervous as hell. Despite having his face etched into my head, I was terrified I’d not recognise him again after all those years! So I made sure I’d get there first so he’d have to look for me!

He turned up late…in jeans and a hoody. He was just how I remembered. Only a 27 year old version of him. I felt sparks fly all over just being that close to him…it was a crazy situation and I just didn’t know how to act or what to do with myself!

We talked again for an hour…..when he made the first move to touch me I just felt an explosion inside me and I melted…….it just confirmed what I knew…..I was inlove with him and probably always had been…just not realised it.

We stayed together insperable for the next week….we confirmed to each other we were inlove……….every second with him was amazing and I didn’t want it to end….

But my week off work did come closing to an end……….and with it the reality of all this came to a head…….how was it to work being so far apart………

On the Sunday morning while he was still sleeping, I showered, packed my stuff and got ready to leave. In the night I decided that anything to come of this could just be far too complicated and I worried too that long distant relationship may just be too hard for him….

So I planned to leave before he had even realised…….

my little white wedding diary...with sugar on

Sunday Feb 07 2010 19:51:07

By Mrs G to be 9 days and counting..

So about us........its very very sickly sweet....like too much chocolate really!

My H2B is called Gruff....or thats my nick name for him :-P ............ he has infact the most beautiful name in the world......millions of other men are called it.......but to me there's only one of him....
He calls himself an 'enigma'.....definition being something extra ordinary.......and to me he is.... to others he's just a lad they know...to me he is the world with a dusting of iceing sugar..... and he always has been...ever since I first saw him....

I first saw him....when I was 14....years ago...14 years ago to be exact.
He went to the same high school as moi...although in the other half of the year group. We shared no classes...no friends...no common interests...but there he was. And everytime I saw him, in the hall, on the field or in the corridoor he just set fire to my heart.

It was the typical unrequited love, the boy didn’t even know I existed. Sometimes he would glance at me, probably feeling the burn of my eyes laid upon him. But that’s as close as I got.
I went through my high school years happy…but day dreaming of the boy, doodling his name in the back of my maths book or scraping it into my pencil tin with the end of a compass.

He was just so beautiful. I never saw boys as being beautiful until that point. I was hypnotised by him. Something stirred inside me…..I had the first feelings of tingles all over my body everytime I saw him!

Inevitably I became 16…I left school…I moved on…to another part of the country infact.
He was my first crush…but someone I never forgot.

Over the years, I became me, I made great friends, I went out, I got drunk!, I bought a house, I changed jobs, I got heartbroken, I broke hearts, I made great friends and lost a few , I made great memories and times I’d rather forget.
I moved on 11 years…as time does…..

But despite what went on in my life……at times he would come into my head. I’d remember him or even find him in my dreams.
I saw old school friends sometimes when I visited back home and randomly heard his name mentioned. I found out he had been in the Army, how he almost got married. Its funny how I was still so interested in this boy…who I never knew….whom I hadn’t seen for a decade.

I even looked for him via friends reunited back in the day….ha!

So he was always in my head. I thought about him, but it was not significant. I was happy where I was…I had no far fetched intentions or fantasies in finding him or us running off into the sunset together lol!

Until one day in May 2008……it all changed……and with the power of the internet……..the boy found me………..

my little white wedding diary...with sugar on

Sunday Feb 07 2010 19:36:29

By Mrs G to be 9 days and counting..

I'm late in writing a blog as its only 10 days before my wedding....but here it is!

Up until yesterday I was only worried about getting a cupcake stand...as Ive looked everywhere and having real trouble finding one!...but now I have new dilema.....I have an eye infection...and at this very time it feels like its starting in my other eye too! can you believe it????!!!!---- I keep thinking its just my luck!!!!!!!!

I guess with this blog I have 3 months of wedding planning to share as well as the story on how my Man and me got together....something I think is fun to write but actually would like to keep to remind me about this special time! :-)......only now Im so upset about looking like Ive been in a cage fight....and for the record my H2B looks equally as beaten with the effects of last weeks stag night.........

Ten days to go.....almost nine...and I could just cry :-(