Hiya...
Any chinese brides out there planning their wedding?!
I get married July 2009. Does anyone want to share their ideas and exitement?!
We are not having a chinese banquet as my H2B is English and my father is not particulary bothered about having one, much to my dissapointment.... but I am trying to intergrate as much tradition as possible like the tea ceremony and wearing Kwa and cheongsam!

xx

Hi Carms

Im a BBC and my H2B is chinese/vietnamese but been in UK for most of his life. He proposed in January this year and we are getting married in May this year.

We are holding a small family wedding and a small chinese banquet. I am not wearing a Kwa but a Red qipao instead to be made when my parents goes back to HK. My H2B side dont want a tea ceremony but my parents do since its our tradition chinese culture. Apparently H2B parents say its not necessary, I was surprised by this as we have similarities and speak cantonese. Must speak to his sisters to find out if they had a tea ceremony as they have chinese hubbies.

T

Hello YM78...
That must have been a surprise to you as you all speak Cantonese and the tea ceremony is such a big thing for Chinese people. You must find out how your family feel about it and do what you want from your heart.
I had a friend who got married last year and she is Vietnamese... she had a tea ceremony with all the family as I believe her hubby is HK chinese.
Maybe you could just have the tea ceremony at home with your parents before the reception? That will ensure that you will fulfill yours and your parents wish and its an intimate moment with your family.
We are having our tea ceremony after our wedding ceremony at the hotel. This means that all of our friends and family will see our chinese traditions and my H2Bs family although English... are very exited about us involving them... and for me... the lai see!!! hehe!
It is the most important part of the day along with my marriage ceremony... and its all because of my personal feelings and my parents first wedding of their 3 children.
Let me know how you get on after speaking with ur H2Bs sisters.
You will have to post some piccies up of your Qipao! I can't wait to get mine... to feel truly chinese and not forgetting my roots. Wow.... May is only round the corner... bet you're getting very exited! I thought my engagement is short... I've been planning since October last year!
x

Hi

I agree its important to keep up with our chinese traditions. It would be exciting and memorable to have the tea ceremony with all your guests present! I wished I had more time to prepare for this wedding, so far there is still alot to do and getting a little stressed cramming it in before May.

Best wishes with the preparations and hope goes to plan with your wedding. I hope both my dresses are ready in time.
Will post the piccies up!

T

so will u girls be doing the 'pick-up bride' routine too? i think it's fun. i got married last month and had my wedding in hk (plus a party after civil ceremony in london a few months ago).

I wish I was doing the 'pick up' routine... but we are following the english tradition and that is for my H2B to see me when I walk down the aisle!
I wanted to do the pick up routine so that the girlies could play some games on the lads and make then suffer!!!
Maybe I will see if I can still get some games in later on at the evening reception?!!! hmm... its got me thinking!!! x

Hi guys

I'm a chinese bride as well. I'm doing a chinese wedding in Mauritius where my family live and a UK wedding as my h2b is english.

So what's the chinese banquet? How does it work? In Mauritius, chinese people get married by either having a 10 course meal that is put in the middle of the round table of 10 people or a chinese buffet still with people sitting down on a round table with 10 people.

I'm doing the Mauritan wedding in the top chinese wedding venue in Mauritius and the Uk one in the top wedding venue in Sussex but its going to be a very small wedding (only 40 guests) The Mauritian one is going to be a bigger do with 150 - 160 people. You get a lot more for your money out there :)

I'm having the civil ceremony in the UK and then a sit down meal and disco with buffet in the evening. The Mauritian one will be a church wedding - I'm catholic as well and then I guess the tradtional tea ceremony where we serve chinese tea to the guests and then a sit down meal. Not sure whether I'm doing a buffet or sit down meal yet. Still waiting on a quote. I'm still wearing a white/ivory dress though. Just need to be careful what type I choose as I need to transport this to Mauritius.

So how are your preparations going?

Meldolly - how wonderful to be having a wedding in Maritius! I envy you to be able to hold a wedding in such a beautiful place!
The chinese banquet in the UK normally takes place in a Chinese restaurant and have many courses - normally about 10 or 12!
Very similar to what you're having in Maritius.
I dont think Ive ever been to a chinese wedding that has had less that 150 guests! They are normally big and colourful! My father was against the idea of me having a chinese banquet (for his own reasons! although we was prepared to pay for it all) so we have gone with his wishes and just having a western style wedding reception and incorporating chinese traditions into the day.
I'm wearing a white dress also - I wont feel like a bride if I don't otherwise! I guess many girls dreams are big fairy tale wedding dresses but the slim, slinky white dresses seem to be so 'in' at the moment too. They will be much more light weight to carry for your check in baggage... but also light weight to wear in the hot weather. Let us know when you decide what you choose!
When do you get married? Your wedding pics will be amazing! sometimes I wished we was getting married abroad too...we considered the idea but we would only have a handful of people going due to flight and hotel costs. So, we decided if we want all of our family and friends to share our day, its best to stick to the UK. Wish me luck for good weather!!! Its in July, so I'm hoping we will... but I think last July it rained alot! Oh no!
xx

meldolly, ur wedding is going to be amazing! sun and sea, v cool indeed. btw, there are companies that sell travel box for wedding dresses, u can do an online search.

YM78, it doesn't take too much time to plan a wedding, don't stress. btw, there is a shop in hk who tailor make v gd thai silk qipao, i wanted to get one made too, but didn't at the end. it is not cheap, around 4k hong kong dollars, they all make wedding and evening dress. http://www.chinoiserie.com.hk/

WY - I love the website! Thanks for that! I adore Qipaos - so elegant! Probably a bit expensive for me,,, but gives me good ideas! x

Thanks guys :)

I'm soooo looking forward to the wedding. What dresses have you chosen? I'm really torn as I wanted to get a lovely princessy looking one but I need to make sure it's not too heavy.

I think that if I go for satin it might be lighter than silk. I've tried the slim line ones and they look great but I think what I really want is a fitted bodice with some ruching or gathering and then a fitted skirt on the top part of my hips and then it flares out so has a bigger skirt. I want pleats in the skirt as well to add that extra something. I'm 5ft 5 ish and a size 8 so I could get away with wearing a slim line dress but I'm not sure whether it'll be too comfortable in the heat. It's better that I have more space for my legs lol

That website looks like it has amazing dresses. I want to get a qipao as well. I might invest in one. I used to have one a long time ago but I never wore it as I was a size 14 then and as its fitted I hated the way it looked on me but I'm sure that now I could probably get away with it :)

I get married in May 2010 and then hopefully August 2010 in Mauritius as we need to get a date from the Chinese pagoda. My family really believe in the chinese traditions so I have to wait probably until the end of the year before I can know what date I can get married. Typical!

We're only getting married in Mauritius as I have to say most of my family are there and all of my h2b's family is in the UK so we want everyone to share our special day as much as possible.

I'm hoping I find a good photographer as I haven't found one yet for either weddings but I have an appointment with one on Friday and the Mauritian one will have to wait until I get a date but I imagine that the pictures will look very tropical as we could go down to the beach as well as its only close by.

WY - thanks for the advice for the travel box, I'll def need to get one of those. It might be good to store my wedding dress in before I transport it to Mauritius as well.

So how's your preps going? You guys should post your wedding pictures and you haven't got a long time to go. You must be soooo excited!

Of course you want to get married in Maritius also... for chinese, one of the most important factors is having your family with you!
I have 2 bridal dresses - one for the ceremony and one for during the wedding breakfast. A big one as I walk down aisle - its a fitted boddice and goes out with a long train. Then the 2nd one is a slim fitting one. Very lightweight, sort of chiffon material over the top with a smaller train.
Then I will wear Kwa for tea ceremony and Qipao just before 1st dance. Would like another for 1st dance and evening! sound so greedy!

I have a fantastic chinese photographer - Ken Lam from Newcastle. He was the first thing I booked! Before venue even. I love his work! check him out!

I'm sooo exited! But I've been stressed with it also... So much to still do!

Wow.. how did you get from a 14 to an 8?!!! Can I have some tips pls?! Would like to lose half a stone!
x

Wow I'm, impressed so many dresses. I'm tempted to do similiar. Have a bigger one for the church and a more fitted one for the wedding breakfast but as its so expensive we'll have to see :)

Can you forward me Ken Lam's details. I'd love to get in touch with him as I'm open to suggestions on photographers as I haven't chosen one yet. Does he charge a lot and does he cover West Sussex as well?

The losing weight thing was pure dedication as I was a size 12 and when I met my h2b i got all relaxed and started eating more and was going on a size 14. My h2b can be VERY honest sometimes lol but bless him its probably one of the best things he said as it prompted me to lose weight as I always had an issue with my weight :) As you know Chinese ladies tend to be quite slim. Can I ask what size you are? All I did was a life style change. I started walking more, doing more exercise, eat a lot more healthy for e.g. always having breakfast something I never used to do as I thought I'd put on weight but thats not the case as then I don't need to eat so much for lunch and dinner. For breakfast I normally have scotch pancakes, prunes etc... Lunch - A ham sandwich with low fat cheese and a pirce of fruit of even low fat crisps and then for dinner grilled salmon with new potatoes and vegetables. I do indulge sometimes though especially now that I'm a size 8 I don't need to eat healthy all the time even if I still do 80% of the time as I don't want to get bigger again :)

another tips i learn from brides in hk to share. girls over in hk wear a basque (corset type thing that they call girdle) underneath their wedding and evening dresses, and kwa qipao as well. it's a long line bra with cups, pads (if u need extra help ) and boning, so it pulls you in the right places. there are different styles, low back, seamless etc. i had a v fitted slimline dress, although i m a size 8, i am not toned and hate the bulges in the mid section when i sit. so i had a flesh coloured seamless basque underneath my dress, also no problem with bra lines showing :)

not sure if you girls can read chinese, but u can look at the pics

http://www.exclusivelymine.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=category&sectionid=11&id=19

btw, carms, yes, u wear the pink or red silk pyjama under the kwa. oh r u going to rent or buy, if u've sisters and cousins, might be better off buying, u can share.

i heard about your photographer, my photographer (or his campany) in hk actually worked with yours, i saw some pics in his blog,

i had kwa in the morning, wedding dress in afternoon+first half of dinner n evening dress for the 2nd half. i rent my kwa and bought my dresses from debenhams n online :). they fit v well, too well that nearly couldn't get into the wedding dress (size 6) as i gained a few pounds before wedding. v gd value too, i was v pleased

Ken Lam the photographer is based in Newcastle... you can see his work on his website...
www.kenlamphotography.com
check it out, he is very good. I am based in Nottingham/ Derby and he is travelling to me.

I love how Chinese people get canged for weddings! I cant wait! I think I need to buy a basque to wear underneath my dresses! Its my belly bulges that annoy me. I think I am a size 8... but if they did size 9's that would probably be perfect! I want to be a perfect 8 for wedding. I was just before Xmas... but somehow, I have started putting weight on! arrrggghhh!!! Meldolly... I will follow your rules an lose some weight! +oil !!!
WY - size 6... you are sooo slim! I'm jealous!
I will need a fitted basque along with alot of bust padding! haha! Thanks for website.. I can read basic chinese... so that helps!
I havent spent alot of money on my dresses. I have been using a chinese company to make mine. They are beautiful! I got them all custom made and they are sooo much cheaper! I dont mind as I will only wear it for a few hours each time and they are perfect fit and brand new. They took my ideas for my own design and they followed it!
WY - who was your photographer?! I want to see your photos! When did you get married?!!! sorry... so nosey! I love weddings in HK... they are so different and the hotels are so nice!
x

carms - your so slim already! How tall are you? I'm probably a size 9 too mind you as nowadays most shops I'm a size 8 with the odd one here and there and I'm a 10 but I'm pear shaped so more like a 10 bottom and 8 top. I'm happy with this new size as I have never been a slim person. I was bigger when I was 14 years old. I saw some relatives recently who hadn't seen me for 6 years and they hardly recognised me as I have always been the fat child lol

I'll def check out his pictures. Thank you. What shop did you use to make the dresses as that might be a good option for me if I want to get a dress for Mauritius and the UK. Could save money rather than buying two expensive designer dresses :)

... I am only 5ft 1! I am so short so any more than a size 8 I will be unhappy... I need to stay this size as my wedding dresses are already here and I wont fit into them if I put more weight on!
I used a company in China - wwwlandybridal.com
There is also kanaccas bridal and also milly bridal. All based in China.
My dresses came after 6 weeks. I designed my own... well, almost! sent them my measurements and they made them for very very little money. They are perfect.
I also ordered 2 BM dresses and another 2 are on order and also a flowergirls dress.
All the dresses are stunning! Although one BM dress is too big, so I am getting it altered.
They maybe not as sparkly as some dresses I have seen here but I am not too fusses! I also ordered my petticoat from them. I think mine are very well made! Even my BM were impressed!
Normally I dont feel like a princess unless Ive paid good money for an item... but I really didnt want to pay thousands over here. All the bridal dresses I liked had price tags of between £1200 - £3000!!! Plus many dresses I tried on here had a made in china tag!!!
Crazy money. I would rather pay for more guests to enjoy the day or have a fantastic honeymoon!

It must be so nice to see famiy and they cant recognise you as you have lost weight! You must be so proud of yourself. Well done!
Let me know what you think to Ken Lam!
xx

Well done on getting those dresses for a bargain. I was torn between a dress in the UK and getting one made too.

After trying on lots and lots of dresses I managed to find "The one" at the National wedding show yesterday lol

It's an essense dress and I even spoke to the designer who had flown in from Australia to promote her dresses :) I just felt amazing in it and didn't want to take it off lol It was £999 and has not come out on the market yet but is due out in her new collection in August 2009 if all goes well as they are trialling it in only a few select stores so might remain a limited collection. It seems quite popular though as there was a lady waiting for me to take it off so that she could try it too lol and even I was hovering aaround later on and I saw another lady try it on :) It ticked the right boxes for me. There is just one thing I wanted to change and its the back and she agreed to put a zip and button back for me instead of the lace up one at no extra charge! I'm not even sure if I want a button or lace up back but button and zip seems to appeal to me more. I also got a 15% discount so I'm only paying £850 which is great as my budget was £1000 top. I'll need to get the length altered as I'm nearly 5 ft 5 and it's probably made for soneone 5ft 8 as it was too long for me!

Your right by saying that you would rather have more guests enjoy the day and have a great honeymoon. Thats why I'm tempted to wear the same dress for both weddings or get one made from landy bridal as a second dress. I'm not paying another £1000 for another dress!!!!

Where do you plan to go on honeymoon? We're not sure yet but Hawaii seems to be winning for me at the moment or maybe a carribean cruise...

It was lovely to see my family and them being genuinely shocked to see the new me. Everyone always said that I was a well nourished child lol but now they said that I'm looking a bit too slim haha You can never win!

I'm sure you won't put on weight. Your a nice size for your height and I would just eat as healthy as you can up to the wedding especially :) I eat healthy most of the time but had a massive indian meal last night which gave me a stomach ache afterwards but it was a lovely meal. A treat!

I've looked at his portfolio and it looks really good but I think that we found our photgrapher on Friday. He popped over and we loved his portfolio and it was a bargain as well. I don't want to spend a fortune on pictures. He's charging £985 for a 150 coffee table photo book, 250 high res images on a cd and 12 - 8/10 shots and 2 - 16/12 shots in colour and/or black and white. We need to pay a deposit of £200 to secure him which sounds good to me :)

Have you bought any favours? I got some good ideas at the National wedding show yesterday and I've managed to find some pretty ivory boxes for £1.20 for 5 boxes and I'm buying gold coloured stickers and putting either chocolates in a heart shaped warpped in coloured foil or sugared almonds. Seems like the boxes and the chocolates will costs arround £35 for 40 boxes. I just need to make the boxes up, put the decoration on and put the chocolates in the boxes myself.

It funny but my maid of honour was so much more enthusiastic yesterday than she normally is when I talk wedding lol She's my best mate and we had so much fun looking around the show. We were there for 7 hours and didn't get bored lol She's offered to help me do the favours. I'm looking at making my own invitations as they were saying its £4 for each invitation and with 100 cards to print spending £400 on cardboard seems a bit excessive to me. I could get a week holiday in europe for that hehe

So who's your maid of honour and best man? My h2b's best mate is his best man and my brother is going to walk me down the aisle as my dad died when I was 2 years old. I don't remember him at all as I was so young!

Has your parent's chosen there outfits yet? My mum said she's going to wear red and my brother wants to get a suit tailored made for him in an asian country. Would you know any reputable people who make suits in asia. I went to Bangkok in November and got lovely suits made for me and h2b but I don't trust them to send them money without having a proper system in place as they just use an email that doesn't seem to be checked very often so any recommendations would be greatly appreciated :)

[Modified by: meldolly on February 22, 2009 12:05 PM]</p>

Wow! You have found The One!!! Not just your H2B... but The dress!!! Essence do some lovely dresses, Got any pics?! And a limited edition one! I personally prefer zip up back with buttons too...
How funny you didnt want to take it off and someone was waiting for you to!
I'm going to the NEC show in Birmingham in March... cant wait!
You sound sooo organised... we get married July this year and I have sooo much to do.
Have you booked your venues yet for both countries? so, you have found the dress, found the photograher (at a good price too!) seen your favour boxes and its now all the cute little bits to do. All exiting!
I have seen some favour boxes too... they are miniture chinese bamboo steamers! I want sugar almond sweets in so they look like little chinese buns and tie some red ribbon round it.
Have you looked at the website 'chineseweddingsbythe knot'? Its a good website and gives good ideas.
Some cute chinese inspired ideas from US and I love it!
Seen the America thing on having escort cards rather than a table plan... so might do that also.
We bought our invites printed in HK. So we have invites in both chinese and english. I love them. I got 100 invites for day guests, 50 for evening, 100 x Save the date cards (as we are getting married on a Tuesday, so wanted to give ppl notice) 100x Thank you cards and all day guest invites with RSVP cards and envelopes for approx £450. All printed and shipped over to me. The main thing was the red in colour, design and both languages printed was my main reason for printing in HK.
Honeymoon??? we are so unsure! We love to travel and we are considering for July/ Aug - either Bali or seychelles. Although H2B was also looking at Hawaii cause he noticed a good deal somewhere. But I'm leaving that one to him. We may not book til very late on so we get a good deal!

Our wedding party is - 4 bridesmaids, sis in law 2B, best mate (gutted cause she lives in HK now - but be back for my wedding) and 2 more girlfriends Ive known for quite a few years. Best Man is H2Bs best mate, 4 ushers, 1 flowergirl and at the mo 2 page boys (H2Bs nephews) but also thinking about asking my cousins 2 boys to be page boys too.
Our top table consists of only BMaids, BMan and Ushers - much easier to deal with.

I am sorry to hear you lost your father at such a young age... but how nice is it that your brother is giving you away. I dread me being given away....obviosuly will be very happy to get married... but I fear I may cry... and for the tea ceremony!
Are you doing a tea ceremony?

I dont know any good tailors in Asia - Bangkok is your best bet - we have had suits made there... but Ive not done any since Ive been back. Sorry I cant recommend any. Did you enjoy Bangkok?! we loved it... we have friends in Koh Chiang too... which is beautiful. Did you travel to anywhere else?
My mum goes HK in March... so she is having a traditional mother of the bride Qipao made. Not sure what colour that will be! My dad in his own suit or might wear the traditional tailcoat as wedding party... my lil bro is wearing same as my H2B.
I am currently stressing over flowers, hairstyles, make up style, decor and cake!
I keep going round in circles with everything. I have changed my mind so much on so many things... take your time and make sure you get what you want! oh... and keep meotiating for a good deal!
WHat day do you get married on? we are a Tuesday.. so been able to get some good deals as well as accommodate all my family!
I think Ive decided on flowers and hairstyle now - my sis in law 2B is a hairdresser, so luckily I can have as many trials as poss! She is bringing friend along to do hair as there will be about 11 of us females having hair and make up done! Manic in the morning I guess!
What will you be doing the night before? I am staying at hotel and going to try and be as chilled as poss!!!

So are we the ONLY 2 chinese brides on this?!!! Where are all the others?!!! I want to share ideas!!!
You on FB by the way?! would be good to put a name to a face?! x

When I went to Thailand I went to Bangkok, Chiang Mai and Phuket but I preferred Phuket as I think it was the beach that did it for me :)

I will be doing the tea ceremony in Mauritius and I'll still be wearing the same dress i guess. I remember when my aunt got married 10 years ago she was so hot and bothered in her dress when she was serving the tea. I felt sorry for her lol but I don't think she even wanted to get married then so she was just getting stressed out with everything. My grandmother paid for the wedding and she was just doing it for her lol

I get married on a Sunday but the next day is a bank holiday.Believe it or not we couldn't get a Saturday in the summer of 2010 in that venue as it was fully booked! Apparently its the most popular wedding venue in West Sussex.