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Honestly! do you think its cheeky asking for money as a gift

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Joined : Dec 14, 2008
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 7:56:02 PM
Subject : Honestly! do you think its cheeky asking for money as a gift

I know theres probably a few threads asking the same thing but I thought I'd bore you with another one!

My h2b wants to put it in writing that we would like money as a gift, my h2b's parents keep saying we should just ask for money too but I just feel cheeky about doing it. As a guest at a wedding it doesnt bother me that people ask for money or have gift lists in fact if anything I think well at least they are getting what they want but now thats our turn I just cant seem to do it:roll:

My h2b's parents said if we're (meaning me) uncomfortable about asking then they'll just tell people we want money. I said this was fine but only if people ask.

We were settled in our house for two years then we got enaged. I really appreciated everything we got but...............we got loads of vouchers for places that we didnt need anything from and we got numerous sets of wine glasses which we'll never use.

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Purplesandpinks

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 8:02:32 PM

I can see why you might prefer cash but I would feel cheeky too, as guests feel they have to be more generous when the amount is known, compared to buying a gift x

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Ch3rub
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 8:09:35 PM

Yes, I think it's cheeky. We don't want gifts but we'd really like cash, we're not putting anything in the invitations though. Instead we're going to tell close family and friends and get them to spread the word. There's nothing that says that guests have to give gifts or money, I even find it cheeky when people include a gift list with their invites!

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facet

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 8:23:28 PM

I dont think its cheeky at all, and wouldn't be offended if thats what people wanted. On saying that I know a lot of people, especially older people who don't like it as they like to hand over a gift. Maybe if you tell people what the money is going towards, e.g. house deposit, new car, new kitchen they would be happier rather than thinking it may end up being used for your weekly supermarket shopping or to pay for your wedding!

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MrsSpanton2be
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 9:10:25 PM

I dont think its cheeky at all. I would just be glad that I knew what the happy couple would want, instead of them ending up with lots of gifts that they dont need.

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drbjme
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 9:49:06 PM

How about a list like blisslist or justthegift where you can choose things like honeymoon, money towards such other items like facet suggested, i personally think its nice to know roughly what the money is/could be going towards.

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MrsSykes2Be

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 10:05:23 PM

We're asking for money for our honeymoon. I think it depends what your guests are like! I know ours are all fine about us asking for money. If their not than thats their qualm, they can buy us a toaster if they are that offended by it. But I know our F&F would rather ensure we got something we wanted. Putting it on an insert in the invite is a good reminder for them, because people forget. If its in print they wont!!

This is what we have said on the invitations

It is your presence not your present that we want on our wedding day, but if you wish to give us a gift, contributions to our honeymoon would be gratefully received.

Wer're not telling them to give us money, we're just 'guiding' them, and I think importantly we are saying what it will be spent on.

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yikes
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 10:36:53 PM

I think it's cheeky, we haven't put anything in invites, Family have asked and our mums have said to people if they really want to give then to give cash as we're renovating the house but it's not expected/necessary

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mrscurtis2010
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 10:38:51 PM

We are putting a little poem in stating that we have our household stuff, would love to get away so if people want to get something then we'd appreciate contributions to honeymoon. But the best gift is having them with us on our day. Short and sweet... a bit cheesy! xx

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mrscurtis2010
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 10:41:50 PM

Ah yeah, I meant to say that as well.... I think it depends on your guests, and I think ours will be totally fine with it. xx

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Italy2010

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:04:54 PM

No I don't think its cheeky at all, people have moved with the times and every wedding I have been to in the last 3 years giving money has just been standard, to be honest I think the majority of guests will be glad that they don't have to ponder over a gift. xx

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doon

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:32:07 PM

I dont find it cheeky. The last few weddings i have been to i have given money anyway. I personally prefer it as it saves hunting around for a gift lol x

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tootifrooti

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:34:16 PM

i think its really cheeky, but then i think gift lists are too, lol.

im going to have a mass of toasters arent i LOL, x

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Mrs Daisytean Forever

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:36:42 PM

Yes I do, and I hate gift lists too!

We asked everyone just to bring themselves and nothing else.

We got a lot of very lovely, thoughtful presents!!!!! A lot of which were M and S and John Lewis vouchers!

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Welsh Dawnie

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:43:57 PM

LOL tootifrooti I feel the same. We did a gift list but i just couldnt put it in invite I felt sooo cheeky! I think I'd rather have a gift someone has thought about and chosen for us. If we end up with a mass of toasters so wat, they dont last forever and we'll have a supply of new toasters for years to come LOL x

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Welsh Dawnie

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:44:26 PM

LOL tootifrooti I feel the same. We did a gift list but i just couldnt put it in invite I felt sooo cheeky! I think I'd rather have a gift someone has thought about and chosen for us. If we end up with a mass of toasters so wat, they dont last forever and we'll have a supply of new toasters for years to come LOL x

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Welsh Dawnie

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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:44:26 PM

LOL tootifrooti I feel the same. We did a gift list but i just couldnt put it in invite I felt sooo cheeky! I think I'd rather have a gift someone has thought about and chosen for us. If we end up with a mass of toasters so wat, they dont last forever and we'll have a supply of new toasters for years to come LOL x

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280810
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Posted : Feb 08, 2010 11:57:04 PM

We've lived together for 15 years we've put a poem asking for money for our honey moon
if your thinking of a gift for us
we'd ask I you'd consider
contributing to our honeymoon
to make it all the sweeter

our house is full of all the things
a couple could require
and so a honeymoon away
is whY we'd both desire

So while sitting on the beach
or by the pool so blue
well both look back and think
it's reilly thanks to you.

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bexyg2bl
Joined : Apr 06, 2008
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Posted : Feb 09, 2010 12:50:42 AM

We were going to have a gift list but decided against it as we have most things we need and most of our friends and family rolled there eyes and said "oh god can't you just ask for money its so much easier" lol! So were asking for money towards our honeymoon. I think it defo depends on the ur guests and what there like tho.
xx

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Megan's mum

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Posted : Feb 09, 2010 1:36:01 AM

I don't think it's cheeky at all, infact i think a lot of people expect it nowadays which is why you get companies running the honeymoon fund at your wedding.

We are putting a little slip in with our invites- we've had three/ four invites since we got engaged with the same in them!! Just saying that we have everything we need for the house and if they want to give us a gift we'd prefer a contribution to our honeymoon, however small.

I must admit that it might feel cheeky when people are stuffing envelopes into the bird cage post box but it's no more than what we'd do for them!

xx

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Aprilrosie
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Posted : Feb 09, 2010 9:05:08 AM

We're also asking for contributions for our honeymoon. I think it's standard these days and we'd rather get honeymoon money than people waste their hard earned cash on presents we'd only end up stuffing in a drawer!

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