I love reading the posts on here and the sense of community, I also love helping people out when possible, I think I feel like I want to impart some of the wedding knowledge I have gather ed over the last months.
But I rarely post anything myself but am feeling the need now.
I am getting married in 110 days and I am now starting to stress quite a lot. I think up to this point I have been quite calm but now things are getting a bit much! I have no haridresser or wedding cake at the moment, my maid of honour dropped out, and I had to have an awkward conversation with another bridesmaid and ask her if she would step into the role, luckily she said yes and wasn't a bit unhappy about being '2nd best' and has been great helping me. Howver all the way through we have had quite a lot of problems with family, as both mine and my h2b's parents are divorced, I mistakenly suggested h2b's dad may like to wear a suit with the grooms party and h2b's mum went crazy and had a total melt down about it, she said some horrible things and now everyone keeps saying it is all forgotten and in the past but I am finding it very difficult to just forget, for one it has tainted my day!
Through everything though my mum was great, not making too many demands on us like everyone else and then in the last couple of months she has suddenly become a bit of a nightmare. She has insisted I invite my uncles to the full wedding and not just the evening, which is fine but has meant I have had to invite my dad's brothers too so our numbers increased by 16 but there was no offer of any financial help with this. Then she told me she would be unhappy if h2b's mum was to wear a big hat because she is mother of the bride, and she knew how mil2b had been with me so there was no way I was raising that issue with her, and when my moh dropped out as she wanted to bring her 5 year old daughter and is a single mum, my mum told me that she does not want her to come with us the night before the wedding for a meal, even though we are all staying in the same hotel, she said it would be inappropriate for a child to be there and would be too late for her anyway, so when I enquired about what she thought we would be having dinner that night, she said a meal about 9pm and a few drinks as I don't get married till 2 so won't need to get up that early!! I was so shocked I didn't really say anything but how ridiculous, doesn't she realise this is my wedding day! And the my younger sister is bm and wanted flat shoes but my other bm's wanted heels so i agreed to compromise and have heels in the day and then because their dresses are long they could wear nice flip flops in the evening but my mum reckons I have overridden my sister and I am mean, when my sister is perfectly happy with this arrangement!! She then said I was pressurising my older sister into organising the hen do, something which she agreed to do over two months ago and has now, after a little persuassion from myself finally booked! I feel like saying to my Mum, 'hey I am the one getting married, can I have some support please' my h2b is great but thinks I should just ignore her, which doesn't really help. I am just strating to feel it all getting on top of me now and really needed to have a vent about it!

You seriously need to get a grip love! You are the bride here, it's your wedding! I have found it's best not to ask people what they want to do, just tell them what I'm doing then let them fall in around me. I know it sounds a bit harsh but if you keep bowing to other people's demands, you'll end up with a wedding that you haven't planned and is not the one you wanted. Sort it out girl! Just be brave.... firm but fair! And don't let anyone tell you what to do xxx GOOD LUCK!! XX

I agree - you should do what you want - this is YOUR day remember!!! The ONLY day you'll EVER have like it x

Just wanted to say thanks for your replies, unfortunately my mum seems to be getting worse, last night in front of my auntie she asked why my auntie was not invited to my hen do?!! How inappropriate in front of the woman! I was a bit shocked and tried to change them subject by suggesting that my sister should call my stepmum about the hen do and then my sisters boyf said 'because she is not invited' and my mum just started laughing, my sister gave him a stabbing look, but it is really not on. Luckily I think my extended family know that we are feeling the pressure as my aunt and uncle both said to keep our chins up!! Feel so deflated about things at the moment, even thought the little bits are stating to come together I just wish my family would be a bit more understanding about how stressfull wedding are! On the plus my sister looked stunning in her bm dress!! :) x

hhmmm why do weddings bring out the worse in some people?
at the start of planning i had this image of all my family and friends coming together to celebrate and be happy for me - not the case - some of my cousins cant be bothered and my mum is trying to treat me like a child..

my grandad gave my mum 1k to help organise the wedding... she didnt tell me did she? all she told me was your grandad has given you some money for flowers.. only when i asked how much can i spend she said hhmmmm try and stick around £600... with this i thought thats a bit vague... not an exact number and then she told me hes given US 1K not her!!! but US.. shes kept it to make sure i dont waste it!! WHAT!!! as if!!! ive planned this wedding on a budget as if id waste it!

just weeks ago she said she will pay for chair covers - my partner Nick didnt really want them but seeing as "she was paying" and wanted them we booked them. Now shes saying i should use grandads money for the chairs! so shes not paying after all!!! and now we are using the remainding £400 on something we didnt even want!!! ggrrrrrrrrr

bless her shes paying for a lot like my dress and bridesmaids etc - but the things shes paying for, she has control over, not me....