Uni or baby

Need a bit of advise not sure what to do. Ive decided i want to become a midwife but that will mean going to uni for 3 yrs. me and h2b get married next may and we had planned on started trying for a baby straight away but i wouldnt want to get pregnant whilst on course. so it would mean we would have to wait at least 3 yrs if not 4 because i dont if it to late to apply for a course now. we want kids soon but dont know if it will be harder to do the training once we have kids. but if i do the degree i woulod want kids straight away which would mean qualifing then hopefully getting a job but i wouldnt be there long before i hopefully left for maturnety leave?

not sure what to do for the best.

I was going to train to become a midwife 6 years ago. I had just qualified as a NVQ 3 Nursery Nurse and this was my next step. But I then started to feel that I was ready 4 my own baby as I always wanted 2 be a young Mum and we were able to cope well with only H2B wage. So within 4 weeks of trying we were having a baby. (thourt it would take a lot longer l lol so I put my plans on hold 4 a bit. 6 years and 2 kids later & I know I made the right choice 4 me. I have not ruled out becoming a Midwife I just want to raise my own 1st. I think you just know when you are ready 4 a baby as it is like a little nagging in your head that will not go away. Good luck with what ever you choose 2 do x x x

[Modified by: miss ali c on June 06, 2009 10:11 PM]

Go to uni. Parenthood is forever, uni is 3 years and its well worth it, the life experience you get is something you can pass on to a child and may help you be a better parent.

different kind of degree course, but when i was at uni, there were girls who had kids, and it's undeniable that what is already a skint and stressfull time was much harder for them. They all managed - no question, but raising babies is expensive for couples regardless of one of you being both unable to do full time childcare, and unable to earn a wage as well.

UNI! I'm a student nurse and I know your course would be pretty similar to mine. There are so many women on my course with children, some very small. admittedly, there are a couple of occaisions where they have childcare issues, but this could maybe be solved if your uni has a nursery like mine does? my thought about getting married during my course was also that it would meant we would have at least a few years together enjoying life as a married couple before were even in a suitable position to have a baby, eg savings, i have a job and ive been in it lng enough for maternity leave. i htink most jobs you need to be there a year to get maternity leave.

OR.. as i was saying your course could be similar to mine. the nmc works in 5 year blocks, so when you start your course you have 5 years to finish it so.. you could start it and have your baby during the course and then go back? i know of quite a few girls who have left my course to have babies. the risk is however you might not come back?

if you really want to be a midwife i think you should go for it, then you would have a really good job as well and that puts you in a good position financially for a baby too.

hope this helps!! xxx

or you could qualify and have a baby before getting a job? dont know if youll have to do some sort of extra course when you come back though?xx

it is possible to do both - I had my little girl in the middle of 2nd and 3rd year at uni, and have just gone back to do a PGCE, now shes nearly 5. It takes hard work,but worth it x

hi,

I'm 21 and will be getting married when im 22. We have just bought a flat together and will hopefully be moving to a house at the end of 2012 (i'll be 24) and im planning for us to have a baby at 25 and THEN go to study to be a midwife at age 26 when i have a baby.id much rather train before my baby goes to school...that's an active decision ive made xx

I would wait. It is obviously possible to go to Uni when you have children but it makes it so much harder. Especially when you have an intense course like midwifery. Once you have done the course you are qualified and when you have your baby you will be in a better position to get a job.

I know its pesimistic of me but your plan to have the baby first depends on you getting pregnant pretty much straight away but it can take some time and if you are putting pressure on yourself to get pregnant it will get stressful and could take longer.

Good luck with what ever you decide.

you don't say how old you are but if you haven't already tried to get into midwifery you may not know how really hard it is to get into. Im now in my 2nd year adult nursing as I din't even get an interview for midwifery. everyone has requirement entries and they get about 2000 entries for 30 places on the course. I'll also say that I have a 3 year old son who was 18 months when i started the course and it is difficult with childcare, its expensive or you rely on family on what is at times a really demanding course!

I think its hard to set out a plan, you could apply for midwifery and if you get a place great, if not you could do the baby thing first and keep applying every year on the off chance. I am now 30 so it makes no difference when you do your training, its never too late to go uni, nor infact are you likely to be in a mega rush to have kids (you don't sound old) so you can really do whatever it is you want most right now!

Jo x

Thank you for your replies. im now filling out the ucas form to start a nursing degree in January. im also applying for midwifery. i would be happy doing either. but think ive got more chance of getting onto nursing degree. Just been working out the bills and think we can just about afford it. May mean cutting down the wedding abit. but we will still get everything we really want.Just need to ask my boss if they will write a reference for me. BTW im 22. before i submit my application need to check its not to late to apply for student loan,

Have you considered doing the nursing diploma? Its better financially, a non means tested bursary instead of a student loan. In my experience it doesnt make any difference if you do the diploma or degree as its easy and cheaper to top up!

They are stopping the nursing diploma, september is the last intake!

I would apply & if you get a place - loveely do that .. you might fin d you don't enjoy it anyway. And if you don't get a place try for a baby

Good luck! x

Hunni if I'm honest I would say go to uni!!!
My h2b made the decision to go back to uni at 24 and it has been so hard on us financially trying to get ourselves up and running. I know if he could have done it before then he would have.
Uni is something best out the way when you are young without too many commitments, then you have options of maternity leave and support systems or taking a career break.
You are still young enough to go to uni and be a young mum at the end of it, at the end of the day once you have your degree no one can take that away and then you can put things on hold to have a family if you want.
x

Baby first girl look at all those poor women who have waited and waited until they are thirty because they kept putting it of because of their career and now they cannot have a child at all remember the optimum age for child bearing is 18-25 that's why its so easy to get caught at that age.
babys are a gift any any woman who would put work befor a child should question weather they should indeed have a child at all because even as a midwife these conflicts will come up as you will have to work nights and shift work which might be difficult when pregnant or with a small baby.
You can study nursing up to the age of about fifty but you may only have a number of years to establish a family.


Have one now while you can and let everyone who thinks uni first cue outside the fertility clinic for their fee go when their 29

mxxxxx