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Hi Everyone!!
So me and h2b have bene discussing cancelling the wedding! Mainly cos we can see it turning into a circus and that isnt what we want!!! We have a meeting with the venue on monday and we are going to go from there! We are thinking of going abroad now instead of having and xmas wedding here! I jsut think me h2b close family and beach sounds perfect! But i am a really impulsive person so I am making sure I do my research!! Anyone else felt like this?
xx

In my mind, without a doubt weddings abroad are much more intimate and personal. Much less money but not necessarily less hassle. We are marrying abroad and having a party in uk on our return to keep all happy and of course we like a party! Getting married abroad is ever so easy, nos hassle with organising the actual wedding, just relatives getting there.
Dont forget you have to get people there - a holiday they haven't chosen and they have to pay for it. Thats what area i have found difficult. You have to be quite hard to it as it did upset me to begin with, dont set your heart on people coming cause they may not be able to. Unless of course your paying for all your guests.
Dont make rash decisions, think it all through, make a list of pros and cons for both and work out what is important for your and your h2b, sod everyone else!!!

Thanks smiffy2010! We are literally having my mum dad bro and nan and h2b mum dad sister and kids thats it!! If we did it aborad and then ask other people but not really expect them to come! Whereabouts are u getting married? We feel like maybe we have bene planning a wedding epople expect us to have and not what we really want so defo going to follow your advice and think and sod everyone else!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
xx

Oh no u poor things its sad ur feeling like this, are u the ones who opted for The Fennes? its absolutly gorgeous. Are things just getting on top of u both?
Make a list of pros and cons, that might help.
Is there too many people getting involved?

We initially thought about getting married abroad but we wanted a few more of h2b family to be there and we knew they would never make it.
I know what u mean about circus, as if u have it here there will be alot more people to watch etc.
Why dont u opt for a small ceremony and meal and then maybe invite a few more to the evening?

I hope you're ok, whatever decision u guys make, make sure you won't regret it, its your one wedding.

xxx

We are getting married in Cyprus June 2010 at the athena beach hotel. Only immediate family coming, and my BF and h2b BF. Really excited, we dont want to get married infront of lots of people and we wanted something special and not traditional. Its more common than you realise!!
When relatives were looking at prices you have this niggle of guilt when they talk about prices but they all want to come and we have said we are having a party at home on our return.
We weren't sure we could afford it here either as if we did do it here i wouldn't want just a simple wedding!!
Hot weather, sea breeze and beautiful views is what i imagine my dream day to be like.

yeah we had booked the Fennes have a meeting on monday to work out how much it is all going to cost before we decide! we have monday set aside for pros and cons lists. We do love the fennes but with all the extras i would want to make it perfct i can see it costing a fortune! I think its harder to have a small wedding in the UK as people will expect to come whereas if we go abroad people will understand and not come! its not like we dont want people there but i can see the focus being about a huge pary ang getting drunk and me and my h2b and tee total so its not really us!!! Its such a huge decision we are so stuck!!! But we arent really sure where to get married!
why does it all have to be so hard!!
x

Aww hun, thats such a hard thing to have to decide.

I can see where ur coming from, ur completly right about people expecting to come when its in the UK, but then its your day and people would have to understand that 1, money doesnt grown on trees and 2, its up to you two.

Its pricey isnt at The Fennes and the marquee is so big, its a difficult choice, if we had enough money we'd of booked that place. Instead we opted for Three Rivers which i have to say had an amazing price and was lovely.. not what i thought at all.

Well good luck with you're meeting, i hope you don't find it too hard to decide it your day and you want it to be perfect.

Hugs, C xx

the fennes is expensive thats why were are going to have a meeting on monday to see exactly how much it will all cost!! The three rivers was lovely we went there to look but the fennes stole our hearts and i fear its going to steal all our money too!!! Ill keep u updated! If anyone has any other advice please leave it here!!
x

Hey it's rubbish you are going through this.
Have a real think about what your day means to you. My partner would have just the two of us going away but that's not for me. I want all my friends and family there. You will have a fab time whatever you do, just make sure you won't regret having the big do!!

We're getting married abroad, a small intimate wedding. We've said we want parents there and everyone else is welcome but we don't expect them to come. Have a think about what you really want, as it is your big day, whatever you do, it'll be a special day for you and h2b to remember forever.

This is all so hard!!! I got loads of brochures today from travel agents to help with the process! we like the look of some of the long haul locations but h2bs family have small children and they wouldnt be able to come and we are ver close to thme so would have to be europe but we love the look of turkey it looks lovely!! This we will wait until the meeting at the UK venue and see where we go from here!! Thanks ladies really appreciate your support!
x

Good Luck tomorrow matey, hope you get what you two want.

x

Well...we went yesterday and we are now no less confused!!! We went with my mum and dad as dad is paying for the wedding. He wants me to have a big white wedding and he was asking loads of questions at getting really excited. Me and h2b got excited again when we saw the venue the Fennes really is stunning and I can see us having an amazing day BUT i just cant seem to justify spending £20,000 on one day I just cant! So dad has said its up to us but we need to decide as we will have to pay a cancellation fee and we will lose the deposit:(
The parents were not keen on going abroad as I do have two elderly nans who would love to be at my big day and if i am honest i would love them to be there too. Dad then threw another log on the fire and said if we want a small wedding he will pay for the honeymoon as well!! So now we are in a realy dilemma!!
I have started looking at really small venues in the Essex Hertfordshire region to hold a small civil ceremony and reception for about 30-40 people!Can anyone recommend n e where small? I want small and intimate and still be able to have a disco and a boogie and invite up to 100 to the evening?
All help much appreciated I don't know what I would do without this forum to vent on!!!!
xx

Hey Snowflake

Sorry I don't have much advice, but in Herts there's Tewin bury farm, they have several venues, one is called the stable and does civil ceremonies, think you need minimum 50 for reception but it can hold 100. Hope this is helpful x x

Hi Snowflake,

I'm sorry to hear you are confused over what to do! I have often felt like a great big wedding can distract you from the real reason you want to get married in the first place so I can understand how you're feeling!
We're getting married in a church and then going on to Harpenden House Hotel for the reception. Their prices are very reasonable and it sounds like it would suit your numbers quite well. You would be able to have your ceremony there too.

http://www.foliohotels.com/harpendenhouse/weddings/index.htm

The staff there are really helpful. Tell them your budget and they will come up with something that suits you.
Good luck and keep us all posted with your decision! xxx