Feelings over a second marriage and who's giving you away!

Hi

Im new-ish...its my second time round but Ive not been on here before!

I get married in 4 weeks...its a small intimate wedding of about 20 guests which we are paying for to stay a weekend away with us instead of spending loads of money on those were not fussed about and would only come for the piss up! hee hee

I was married when I was 20...but the ex did some horrendous things to me..so we divorced when I was 24 unable to live in such a way.

I then met the man of my dreams....truely! he was my childhood sweetheart and after years of not seeing him we met again two years ago!

My mum was skeptical of me getting married again after the last time and said we dont need to...but I feel so different this time and older..and know what I want from life, how to get it and whats important. I also learnt alot about respect due to my past

She's ok about it now, looking forwards to it (i hope) and just worries over me doing the right thing.

I also hope my H2b knows how differently I feel. Its his first time so Im not sure how he feels about me being married before. He's obviously ok with it to be with me...but I dont know how he actually feels. He was almost married once but she called it off four months before it happened and decided to go and live abroad!

I know we all have a past.....but I just love him so much and hope he really understands that and I cant wait until our wedding day.......

Lastly.................. Im not sure who gives me away this time.....? I dont have a Dad...my brother gave me away last time but he cant come this time due to his job. Didn't know whether to ask my mum or just to take the asile on myself!! what you all doing?

x

Hi

Im new-ish...its my second time round but Ive not been on here before!

I get married in 4 weeks...its a small intimate wedding of about 20 guests which we are paying for to stay a weekend away with us instead of spending loads of money on those were not fussed about and would only come for the piss up! hee hee

I was married when I was 20...but the ex did some horrendous things to me..so we divorced when I was 24 unable to live in such a way.

I then met the man of my dreams....truely! he was my childhood sweetheart and after years of not seeing him we met again two years ago!

My mum was skeptical of me getting married again after the last time and said we dont need to...but I feel so different this time and older..and know what I want from life, how to get it and whats important. I also learnt alot about respect due to my past

She's ok about it now, looking forwards to it (i hope) and just worries over me doing the right thing.

I also hope my H2b knows how differently I feel. Its his first time so Im not sure how he feels about me being married before. He's obviously ok with it to be with me...but I dont know how he actually feels. He was almost married once but she called it off four months before it happened and decided to go and live abroad!

I know we all have a past.....but I just love him so much and hope he really understands that and I cant wait until our wedding day.......

Lastly.................. Im not sure who gives me away this time.....? I dont have a Dad...my brother gave me away last time but he cant come this time due to his job. Didn't know whether to ask my mum or just to take the asile on myself!! what you all doing?

x

Hi,
Congratulations on your forthcoming wedding.

I'm a second timer too and like you my Mum and Dad were very uninterested in the wedding but now as the time gets nearer are looking forward to it. My Dad gave me away the first time and to be honest I would feel a bit daft if he did it again - He's also likely to say something like 'Here we go again' as we walked down the aisle!! Not known for his tact my Dad. So, for me, the obvious choice was my teenage daughters - I dont want bridesmaids, but I did want the girls to dress up and have a big part in the day. We're walking in to Ernie Doe's version of Here Come the Girls.

I think if it wasn't the girls doing it, I would probably walk in by mself, but I also think it would be fabulous if you had your mum walking you in - and I'm guessing she would be delighted too.

Your wedding sounds lovely, have a fantastic time and best wishes for your future together, however you decide to get down that aisle. x

Hiya, my second time and h2b's first as well, my first wedding was register office so I walked in with h2b. This time we're getting married in a church so was gonna ask my dad to give me away. I'd prefer my 8 year old son to do it, but I just think it would be so awkward as my dad will be there and I think he's expecting to do it.
My parents couldn't be less interested and it upset me at first but there are so many people that ARE interested that I'm not that bothered anymore!
So in answer to you question OP, maybe you and h2b could come in together? Hope you have a wonderful wedding whatever you decide xx

hi ya! i was a second time bride and i had my 2 boys give me away as i asked my dad and his response was " i did it last time and you came bouncing back lol" on the serious side tho it was his idea to have the boys do it,,,,,,, and my dad was bursting with pride at his grandsons (13 & 14 ) x

Thankyou for your replies!

Think Im gonna follow trend ans ask my little girls to do it...they are 6 and 8 and are bridesmaids!

Im sure my Mum wont mind!

We are getting married in an old church so dont really want to walk in with H2b....we are not seeing each other the night before and stuff and want to be traditional

Thanks again girls

L X

I'm having my son to give me away. I didn't feel my Dad should be giving me away because I left home many years ago when I got married the first time plus H2B will become my childrens stepfather.

Personally I felt it was up to our children if they wanted us to get married and to give me away not my Dad and luckily my father is happy with this and totally understands. He is also relieved he hasn't got to do a father of the bride speech.

I don't think it matters who gives you away...as long as you are really happy with it. This day is all about the bride and groom - it is a shame if other members of the family have strong opinions either way but if you remember this is about you and your h2b then it helps keep some perspective.

It is my second time around for both my h2b and myself. We both had large church weddings first time round, so this time we are doing it quietly in a castle! I want both my 2 sons from my first marriage to be very active in the ceremony. My youngest is going to be a ring bearer and my eldest will sign the marriage cert as a witness. I get married in September.

I wish you all a wonderful stress free wedding. And a very happily ever after. xxxx

Hi, couldn'y help but read these posts and make a comment.We were both second time around( I was widowed and he was divorced) but my lovely lady Minister agreed to marry us. When I asked about being given away she corrected me and said.... you were given away the first time so this time you are being escorted.That was meput in my place.
We had a wonderful day, didn't worry about anything and enjoyed every mimute. Oh...I had a beautiful lace wedding dress and the my best friend wore a lovely "bridesmaid" dress. Not bad for a 63 year old!!!
Hope you all have fantastic weddings and good luck.
Morag x

Interesting topic -

I don't really have contact with my dad so it wouldn't make sense for him to give me away, even if he could get into the country. I was thinking my brother but only because I thought it would be the next best thing but after reading this I now realise that the only person that should be giving me away is my daughter.

I have never been married and have been a single parent all her life. She is now 9 and it has always been just us 2 together until my fiance came on the scene last year.

I feel a bit dopey for not even thinking of it but I think the problem is I am getting all caught up with conventions and tradition Instead of doing what my heart would want.

Thank you guys. I realise the thread wasn't mean for me but I feel so lucky I stumbled upon it.

Hi ladies.

I definately agree that it's up to you who you have to 'give you away' whether it be your first marriage or any other subsequent one.

I did have my dad give me away this time as he never got the chance to do it the first time, my first wedding was a VERY quiet registry office and we didn't tell anyone about it. My parents didn't want me to marry him (they obviously saw what a rat bag he was whereas i was blind lol). It felt right *for me* to have my dad do it this time since hubby actually asked for his blessing before proposing to me.

Hi there,

this is my second time around too but my h2b's first. My parents have taken no interest at all in this wedding and it annoys me especially after the awful time and way my ex was with me you would think that they would be happy that I had found happiness and love at last, but hey ho. On the other hand my future in laws have been fantatic, mil2b went with me for my wedding dress and cam e around the venue with us and has been to several wedding fayres too with me.
Anyway, back to the question!! lol I am having my 2 boys (12 and 14) walk me down the ailse in September this year.

Good luck to all you other lovely ladies xx

Why don't you give yourself away? :\)

hi all, its second time for both myself and h2b. its reg office. but am spending night before with my sister, and gonna go in separetly at reg office. gonna ask sister or brother in law to walk in with me. my first wedding was for wrong reasons and none of it how i wanted it, this time its just nice and simple and for the right reasons.

Its 2nd time round for both me and H2B and we are both so excited.
I cant really and wont speak about H2Bs first wedding but mine was just very small cheap and wrong. I got married for the wrong reasons ( basically because we had a baby 6 months earlier) and looking back we should never have got married.
This time round its totally different. Its quite pathetic how I gush on about my fella and we been together now for quite a few years and im still besotted with him, and we also have a little 18 month old together (as well as my 14 and 12 yr old)
Our wedding isnt really a huge affair but its the wedding I have always dreamed of. Beautiful venue, Haigh Hall in Wigan, gorgeous dress ( I hired my first one it cost me £60) and everything is exactly how we want it, we are so excited.
My 12 yr old son is giving me away because I wanted ehoever gives me away to be happy for me to be marrying my guy, (dad is a funny b**ger and doesnt really get on with anyone) and my son and daughter adore their step dad to be so I couldnt think of a better person to ask to give me away than my son. When I did ask him he cried woth joy and said he'd always wanted to do a speach anyway, he said he wanted to talk about my H2B and say how thankful he was at how he treats him and his sister like his own kids and thank you for all he does for them which i thought was soooo lovely. Anyway, I was terrified of telling my dad that I wanted my son to give me away but mum had had a word with him explaining my reasons and so dad said he didnt mind at all and that he does like my H2B. I just said that H2B makes me and my kids so very happy and he should be happy with that at least so its all good. Dad says he is still going to do a speach though if its ok and we agreed that its fine.
Its 151 days to go and we cant wait, coz this time i know its for keeps....GUSH GUSH GUSH lol.

Nicki xx