So confused!

Hi

You know how it is, you dream of a wonderful wedding practically since the day you were born, i remember at age 8 thinking the best age to get married would be 25 and that is the age I will get married, I'm now 38 and got engaged at christmas - LOL!

Anyway, horse and carriage, cinderella dress, roses around the doors and up the aisle were my absolute must with a carpet of rose petels to walk on was my childhood dream.

Reality hits, everything is megga expensive, hardly any venues allow confetti let alone carpets of rose pettles even if you could afford them.

Since Christmas day I have chosen then changed my mind, chose again, changed my mind again and now I feel like I'm never going to decide on anything!

Any other brides in the same boat as me - I've searched the web, browsed books and magazines and just cant decide on anything.

The only thinks we have decided on are:

My wedding ring style - platinum or silver with gold edging and evenly spaced diamonds around the centre,
Colour - burgandy
Transport - horse and carriage (depending if we can settle on a venue not too far away for the horse to pull the carriage)
Helpers - bridesmaids and best man.

I do love all this but just wish I could decide! :\)

xxxx

Hi there,

Im in the same boat as you. Im 33 and only got engaged on valentines day.We have to keep everything to a small budget as we have 4 daughters. the youngest being only 6 months old and massive extended family..and only bought our first home last year so got a new mortgage....we want to get married abroad and have a party back home (we live in ireland), as it will probably work out cheaper than a sit down dinner/reception over here. But so far We cant even come up with a destination....

I really want to throw myself into planning but i just dont know where to start.... Aaaaahhh

xx

Hello Ladies,

I felt exactly the same when i started to plan my wedding a few months ago, I would say the best thing to start with is the Venue once you have decided on that you can start to piece everything else together, like colour centre pieces ect, it does feel really like you dont no where to start, but i found once i had done a few bits the rest kind of just follows.

Hope that's maybe some help xx

Hia

Thank you both for your replies, Im so glad Im not the only one feeling like this.

Have just spent today with H2B looking at venues, had a look at one which was doing weddings for a grand but hotel so terribly run down and unloved we discounted it.

The others we looked at made us feel we had to fit in with their agenda and they wouldn't cater for ours to they too have been struck off the list.

So now we are going back to the original venue which is megga expensive (for us) and looking at areas we can cut back on i.e transport, flowers, photographer and go for cheeper options.

For me its the wedding venue rather than the bolt on extras which are more important along with the transport - Horse and Carriage is almost a must for me.

Will keep searching though in the hope that a long lost relative suddenly realises I exist and wishes to leave me £10k in her will! LOL!

Your advice is a big help - thank you, and I do apprecite you taking the time to reply.
xxxx

Ah Good luck dont worry you will find it, we was exactly the same with money and having a budget, But just keep looking, even if they dont look that great on the net go and have a look, because i didnt even want to go and look at the venue im having and i ended up loving it when we went to see it.

Good Luck x

One way to look at it might be to think, yes, that's what you wanted when you were a child but now you will do something lovely in a different way?

Btw - I'd put in a word of warning against silver in a wedding ring. Silver tarnishes easily, esp. in contact with water/damp. It leaves black marks on your skin. So if your ring is silver, you will have to be incredibly paranoid about talking it off before washing your hands and so on.

Good luck with planning - it will be great even if it's not what you once thought you'd do.

I have a silver thumb ring I have worn every day for 10 years and it hasn't tarnished, I find that silver tarnishes when it isn't worn not when worn all the time.

Good luck with the planning

Keep looking at venues there are some really nice ones out there. ask about it is sometimes the ones that arent advertised much that are the best and those that are advertised are the pits. You will find one that you like,

And yeah your dreams about a wedding do not always traslate into reality cause lets face it you have an endless budget in dreams, how abut if you have your first venue but during the week or off season then it will be cheaper

call me crazy but i got together with my h2b when i was 17 and we spoke about getting married like a few month later! when you know you know!

my life plan was to be engaged at 21 married at 22 and kiddies at 24!!

well it didnt happen like that but so glad we waited s everything is much more affordable now! so now i'm getting married at 24 and i'm more than happy with everything that i'm planning!

it is a bit confusing at the beginning but one you pick your venue and your date everything starts to follow......after 2 years of planning everything is finally coming together and its amazing to see it all!! can't wait until the day to see the whole lot!

no matter what you decide on your day will be perfect x

Hi all

Thank you for your words of wisdom, Just to update you all we have found a lovely little venue, a small country house hotel which do everything we want. Its not as posh as our first choice but definately more us as its in the country rather than the town - it also has a very small swimming pool which will keep my bridesmaid very happy - lol!

As we wont need the horse and carriae (compromising with the hotel and budget) I can spend more money on the ring and flowers!

Take care and thank you all for replying, I appreciate the support.

xxxx

Totally with you! Since being s little girl all I've dreamed of my wedding, a beautiful winter Christmas themed wedding with reds and greens and baubles and glitter!! Also thought that if I wasn't married by 26 I would be on the shelf!!

I'm 31 and got engaged on Christmas eve and as family live miles away and with snow worries we're having a spring wedding! I'm now starting to think of ideas but keep changing my mind... Suppose it would be boring if our wedding was the one in my head for the last 20 odd years!! I'm rather excited now about tulips and yellow and perhaps purples?! X

ok - so no horse and carriage - but y don't u +bridesmaid set a few hours aside day before wedding and go horse riding? ditto re "what my wedding will be like" for years - now 40, engaged oct and marrying June - everyone says the days up to wedding are frantic - hence why lovely idea to buidl time in for something you LIKE doing and wanted. No idea how old bridesmaid is but think most little girls pont mad - and as a "brifde and maids " special think it could work without breaking bank. If your not near home day before, bet venue could recommend somewhere.... venurMaybe hot