I've read for a while but never joined until tonight - feeling "old" !!

Ok so probably a bit of an unusual post. This is my second marriage. (I mean second as in second husband not the blessing). I'm 42 we got married earlier this year as I was ill and have decided to have a blessing in June '11 abroad. (Our wedding day over here was very non descript and really done because of legalities because of my illness) I want the complete "works" on my day. I'd love "the dress", "the flowers" etc but am wondering should I tone everything down a bit because of my age? I never wore a veil first time round and really want one this time along with a fabby dress etc. So the question is I suppose do I go with what I want or follow "tradition" and have a very non descript plain dress etc... I'm just a bit worried about what other people will think if I have the dress I would like, the veil, the flowers etc with it being "just" a blessing (which it isn't to us) if yoy know what I mean

Hi Tinkercat, that's exactly how I was feeling, it's my second marriage too, I'm 47 and getting married in April.

We are going all out on the wedding, so I thought why not go all out on the wedding dress too, so I'll be having dress with train, veil, headpiece, hair and make up done, 4 bridesmaids, 2 page boys. Don't think I've not had wobbles about my dress etc as well, but what I find helps me is when I see images of older brides and they look fantastic in their full-on wedding outfits.

I understand exactly how you feel, and it's very easy to say that it's your day you should do what you want etc etc but that doesn't stop the little niggly feeling inside does it!

However, I think that if I didn't do the full thing then afterwards I would really regret it.

You only live once ladies, id go for it xxx

Oh I'm glad it's not just me then This is our day as the way I see it, and hubby is adamant that he wants the big day etc. I need to give myself a kick up the bum really don't I and stop worrying what anyone else thinks xx

Very true lilywilly and that's the attitude I'm having from now on

Tinkercat, like you say if your hubby wants the big day and you do also, then that's all that matters.

I'm getting married for the second time next August. And although I am younger than you (I will be 29 when I get married) I don't think that you are ever too old to have 'the works' for your wedding. I am having a far bigger wedding the second time around and I think you should too! If you want the big dress, the perfect flowers and 4 bridesmaids then go for it! There is nothing wrong with wanting to show the world that you are blissfully happy, and anyone who turns there noses up are probably just jealous!

Can I just say this is my second marriage and I am having the full works again! I don't feel guilty about it at all. I feel really really lucky I have the opportunity to do it all again.

I was only 25 when I first got married and had the big church wedding, big dress, sit down meal etc.

This time I am still doing it big - I have a castle! But less guests as it is more exclusive. I noticed that actually many of the guests in my old wedding photos I am not even in touch with anymore so didn't want to spend loads of money on people I don't know that well this time.

This is really about what you want. Life is not a dress rehearsal. Go for it as this may be your only opportunity to do it!

I get married in just over two weeks and I am more excited than any teenager!

42 is not old!! Go for it. You are marrying the man of your dreams so should have the day to go with it xx

Hiya girls
just wanted to put my 2 bob in i was 50 when i got married second time and i wanted all the works as i had never had them my husband said at the time anyone who does not share your excitement and disagrees with having the works shouldnt be there

any way i did it 2 yrs ago best thing i ever did the dress the veil everything and it was so natural GO FOR IT GIRLS its fantastic xxxx

Its your day and you have every right to do what you want and enjoy it!