Breakthrough!

Friday Aug 29 2008 08:36:42

By fallulah

I have found my inner peace! haha

Ive been thinking long and hard about why i was so insecure in my relationship, and quite honestly ive come to the conclusion that its been my low self esteem that made me believe that h2b wouldnt want to stay with me...

Im still struggling with the low self esteem issue, ive decided thats what it is, but i cant pin-point the exact moment in my life when ive thought that im not good enought to keep a hold onto my man...

I turned into this green eyed monster whenever he talked about the 'girls' in work... i'd never admit it to his face, but oh, i was snarling on the inside! haha

But then, when i was walking the dog, i re-evaluated why.
This wonderful man didnt just take me on, he made the decision to be a father figure to my little girl (who is hard work, as any 5 year old would be), and he truly is fantastic! in every way.
He makes me feel loved and appreciated and ive got no reason what-so-ever to think he's gonna get bored and run off!

I know i shouldnt have started planning the wedding so soon if i was so insecure, but i cant imagine my life without him, and had these visions of us being married long before he proposed.

So now, with only 7 months to go until our wedding, i can finally say that im secure in my relationship, he loves me, and he's with me because he wants to be, not because he feels pressured to stay! (yes that does sound crazy, but thats how i felt) and he really wants to start trying to conceive pretty much soon after the wedding! what more of a commitment is there?

It feels as though a huge weight has been lifted. im no longer suspicious of who he's talking to in work, or who he's texting... its all just plain daft. i cant believe how stupid ive been.
I could have easily pushed him away with my insecurities, and they were all unfounded.

And now for the exciting bit of planning the final bits of the wedding. i can relax about it all.

RELIEF!

Recent Comments

Breakthrough!

fallulah, i'm so happy for you. to be happy and content is the best gift ever and i'm so pleased you've found inner peace. good luck with planning and i hope your wedding day is everything you've dreamed it to be. also good luck TTC and have fun 'practicing' before the wedding ;)

Posted by mummy&bride2b

August 29, 2008 08:52 PM

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