How to disaster-proof your wedding

Are you caught up in a wedding whirlwind, feeling like you're in a blizzard of conflicting opinions? Alas, it's not all about champagne and meringues and sometimes disaster strikes, whether a caterer won't commit or a venue double books the date. The best thing you can do is to plan ahead, and to be prepared to make the best of any unavoidable mishaps.

Money matters
It's tempting to postpone boring budget discussions, but unfortunately, this is a crucial aspect of the wedding and you need to know that everything fits in to place. Be honest about what you can afford to spend, and if family offer to contribute, they need to tell you the exact amount they're talking about. When you have a working total, be realistic about what's feasible. Set priorities and allow yourself to splurge on a few special things if you tighten the purse strings in other areas. If it looks like you're going over the top, slow down and work out how you can get back on track. It's always a good idea to allocate 5-10% of your total to ‘miscellaneous expenses', covering for any expenses you forget to budget for.

When it comes to families, unless they're planning on paying the bill, you need to explain the style of wedding you would like to have and be honest and open about what can be afforded. Compromise is essential, listening to everyone's ideas to create a day that all family members will enjoy.

Disagreements with your venue
Sometimes venues promise the moon, but instead give you a bumpy ride back to terra firma. A couple might be told they have exclusive use of the grounds only to find that there's another wedding taking place on the same day. The contract is key here. Insist on clear terms in your venue contract. Specify times when you, your suppliers and your guests will have access to facilities, which areas will be exclusive use etc. If it's not written down, you have no recourse. If everything's in writing, you should be able to take action after the big day.

All stressed out
As well as making a major life change, you're also planning the biggest party you've ever thrown and it's perfectly understandable that you're going to have the occasional ‘off' day. Try to keep stress under control by writing to-do lists and focusing on one task at a time, prioritising elements that are most important to you. Don't be afraid to delegate - bridesmaids, best men and ushers are all there to help! When things get stressful, it's not unheard of for the bride and/or groom to suffer a case of ‘cold feet'. Generally this is due to nothing more than nerves, and if your groom clearly doesn't want to call it off, but is struggling with constant talk of the big day, it's time to take some time out. Spend an evening together where you reassure him that he's the most important thing in your life (as opposed to the flowers / favours / bridesmaid dresses as he may suspect!)

Dealing with suppliers
It's wise to avoid arguments with suppliers at all costs - they can wreak havoc on your day! Instead, always choose professional and trustworthy people and find out as much about them as you can. When it comes to caterers, have a tasting whenever possible. With bands, ask whether you can see them perform live. Florists, cake designers, photographers and videographers should all be able to show you examples of their work. And, ensure your contract specifies the service to be provided, including details such as menu choices and exact brand names of wine, champagne, spirits and soft drinks to be supplied. Outline the exact date and time the suppliers should arrive, as well as any breaks and performance times, and the time for them to pack up and leave the premises. Re-confirm details with all your suppliers a week or two before the wedding and your day should run like clockwork.

Finally... remember that whatever small mishaps on the day, it's still going to be the best day of your life. Whether it rains or shines, relax and be sure to enjoy every precious minute.

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